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Sleepy = Disenchanted.
I am loathe to identify
myself, but it struck me that I (Sleepy) do have 2 different answers to that
disgusting question: "What are you?"
who cares? take me back.
Alright, listen...
Intellectually, I am beyond "atheism".
Call me "disenchanted".
Answering to theists and their theism is like contemplating intellectual suicide.
As long as they persist, I will treat every theist as a feckless
child, and put them in their place without hesistation. My maturing mind
has been made up on this. I will never be permissive of the brutality
and idiocy that Christians and other dogmatic theists have imposed on my human
race. Religion has been allowed to diminish the pursuit of wisdom that once
distinguished me and my species from nature. It has evolved into a widespread,
decimating disease.
The intellectual ideas that spew from theism today are, to me, flagrantly
puerile and pointless,
like wannabe-upstream, backwater swirls in a majestic river of Western philosophy
and thousands of years of explorative thought. A bloody waste of mind
and matter! Intellectually, you may call me anything you like, because you know
everybody finds their own special way to define me. I'm complex, not abstract.
There is one thing you can count on: no god living in my head.
***
Spiritually we find another Sleepy altogether. This is the side that first
came upon the room from the Philosophy
and Metaphysics chats, guns drawn, firing rounds into resident atheists 10-at-a-time,
as fast as my hands could type - much like the power trips fundies
try to take, time and time again. During the Sleepy riots, I would spend hours
immersing myself in heart-felt, almost scientific explanations of what I know
spirituality to be. I draw mostly from childhood, when my mind and imagination
were free and not so susceptible to investments into arrogance and good old-fashioned,
American psychological abuse. In that world, and to the extent that it
still remains, every god had a chance with me, and still does.
So I'm not an atheist, and I'm not an agnostic, and I'm sure it's great fun
picking my brain on how I define those 2 terms. My intellect tells me both are
non-existent, especially if there never was any "god". I don't miss
the pink unicorns I've heard so much about, and I don't intend to start pining
after an absent god. If there is such a thing, he hasn't made his "existence"
or "beyond-existence" known to me, and I've given him plenty of time
to show up. I see the psychoses of believers, and I am not jealous of
them. But I don't pretend to know the substance or creation of all existence
to any acute degree, because hey, how much can a person's short experience here
on earth reveal into the totality of all things?
To be more precise, even though I carry on quite well without God, I shall never
make the mistake of believing "Him" to be without validity - as a
myth. I look to the bible and I see a confused English translation
of ancient minds. It's nauseating. I witness preachers in their tactics
and I can see quite instantly the difference between wisdom and psycho-capitalistic
campaigning. But to read between the lines, to glean some measure of understanding
of the Judeo-Roman traditions we live by, and locate depths of spiritual substance,
and genetic memory, and psychological exploration, and wisdom, and social contract,
and hierarchy of values... that the biblical stories try to codify. There is
much to be gained by respecting the truth behind the myths. Which is why fundies
are SO offensive... they clearly have no clue... no truth. They are all-myth,
and no context. Just a bible and an urgent insistence that their delusions of
grandeur be respected - or else. That kind of thinking can "go
to Hell".
In the bible, we can see the spirits of today's physical science, math, biology,
politics and history where they first began. It's a myth, not a lie. Aliens
didn't create the design we live by, we did. Deep within ancient communicae,
one should be able to merge with his ancestors' thinking... after all, it was
only 200 generations ago. And if you can forgive the differences between
your central-heating-cozy modern mind, and the cold, filthy, smelly, short-lived,
virile, mud-house lives of those who took time out of their farming and fearing
to carve their more resonant dreams into stone... you can appreciate those myths
for what they really are. Not arcane and untouchable at all, if you're willing.
I don't care how many Christians tax the credibility of the Jews for personal
glory... the bible is history... the FIRST history... and it's an integral part
of a beautiful species. (Nearly extinct). I need that history. And I love
it. It's MINE. And I intend to defend it from the burdens of modern
psychology. Forever...